Children's Book

Earlier, I mentioned I wanted to write a children's book? "Why", I ask myself. I want to experience the spontaneiety and magic that I associate with childhood----not my own, but the adventures I entered into through reading. If it's not there now, why not create it?

Well, the magic and spontaneity have started. My friend, Linda,to whom I just fed a salmon dinner, has named at least a dozen characters ranging from the Rhutabaga Woman to the Mustard Monks, searching for the lost secret. She is also sitting me down to write blogs, dear readers, for practice. So, now I'm a week-old published blogger. Who would have dreamed. If you would like to have these blogs discontinued, please contact Linda @ wonderlane dot com. (I do know how to write a web address, but we're trying to avoid the robots in outer/cyber space.

Conditional Reality

What is your default setting? How do you experience reality when you are just in yourself and there's not something pulling you away from that? You might be surprised. Even what we tend to think of as "reality" or just the way things are is most often totally affected by our past. We don't know it though, because we never think to question what has always been there.

For example, I recently realized that my default setting is that something is missing; something that I need isn't there. As I saw this more clearly, I recognized that it was an habitual state of mind that I developed as an infant, when I was left alone for too long. In fact, I was right. Something was missing--the present. I was experiencing present time through past mind-set. The exploration continues.

Too Serious

I just read a pedophile's blog, got into his mind, and talked about it. It all feels so serious and heavy and painful. Could this be why I want to write children's books. I want easy access to the magic, delight, and spontaneity of a child's awareness. Just changing the subject changes this subject for the better. Got rhutabegas?

Learning to Blog

Today, I read my first blog--the one by Fifth Nail, the man just accused and arrested for murder and more.I only read this because I'm with a friend who is teaching me how to blog and she had copied his site, just as it was being taken down from the Web. Why would I read this? Why would anyone? Because it is my work to understand the human mind--my own and others--and to transform consciousness.

What have I understood? That there are unconscious forces that can be much stronger than our conscious awareness; that often we have very little capacity to control them. If you think you don't, just remember the last time you tried to diet or exercize and were unable to. I feel lucky that my demons are simpler and more socially acceptable than a pedophile's.

We all have hatred and anger, whether conscious or unconscious. Sometimes it is turned toward others; but probably more often turned against ourselves as judgment or criticisim. If we aren't conscious of our own capacity to hate, and we only see ourselves as good, it is unlikely that we can feel compassion for those who act out their hatred. Om shanti, shanti, shanti. May all Beings Experience True Nature.

Attachment Liberating into Space

When I talk about attachment, I'm talking about an identification with the past and the patterns that forms, whether conscious or unconscious. All of our identifications and patterns come from past experience and prevent us from experiencing the present as it is.

I'm not talking about detachment in the present. I''m talking about detachment from bringing the past into the present. In the present, one can be fully absorbed, alive, passionate, spontaneous.

When attachment to identifications is gone; ie. I'm a good person. I'm always nice. I'm a spiritual person. I never get angry, etc., then there is no fixed structure of who you are that was formed as a defense against the pain of the early childhood experience; then there is only essential nature arising as needed in each moment--it can be experienced personally or impersonally depending on the moment.

I'm not suggesting that you should try to be detached. That's just another should; another structure. I am saying that as you bring into awareness the deep structures/beliefs/emotions that have been unconsciously running you, then the attachment to them automatically is less.

With understanding of how they were formed and the purpose they served, the attachment lessens even more. But, the attachment can not dissolve until the emotional charge of the pattern is gone---that means feeling it fully til it holds no more charge. There are countless identifications, body images, beliefs, etc. that form our ego identity.

The more of these that come into awareness and dissolve, the freer, the more open and spacious we feel.